It has been one of those days…or mornings, since today is only technically half over. Really? Only HALF over…seriously?
Two crabby monsters have taken over my children’s bodies. And a big grumpy monster has taken over my body. I feel like I swing between irritation, frustration, and exhaustion lately as a mother. Oh and extreme anger. Yep, my name is Brittany and I have an anger problem. And a patience problem. And a host of other nasty problems when it come to my children. Around adults, I am virtually perfect–sweet, loving, patient, intuitive, and gentle.
To my kids? I am a grumpy, yelling banshee. 😛 🙁
Micah and I butted heads all morning. I don’t know if he was tired or just in a really bad mood but he was crying, clingy, whiney, defiant, mood-swinger etc. etc. etc.
I feel like every other word coming out of my mouth was “NO! STOP THAT! QUIT! MI-CAH!” etc. etc. etc.
As far as the things I got done this morning, it looks like I’ve had a great day so far:
I showered! (be excited for me. It doesn’t happen every day)
Did the dishes (again, be excited. This usually doesn’t happen before 4pm)
Did a load of laundry (Micah soaked through his pull up and wet his bed. Pretty much a daily thing. I will be so glad when they are night-time potty trained)
Fed and dressed the boys
Dressed them again after the both had accidents 😛
Made banana chocolate chip muffins with my squishy brown bananas
Played outside for 1/2 an hour
I wish the playing outside could have been longer but Micah fell off the swing backwards (not while swinging) and got covered in mud (I think I dressed him again after this…) and then was inconsolable.
(btw, I am covered in mud too from the boys kicking me in the legs while I was pushing them on the swings. Oh, and mud is all over my butt too from Micah’s shoes when I was holding him. And no, I have not dressed myself again).
Whenever Micah had one of his meltdowns today (and there were MANY!) he would wail “I WANT MY DADDY!” This has been his mantra lately. Mommy just doesn’t cut it these days.
He also cries for Daddy when I am mad at him. Yep, I guess I am the mean parent.
After the swing incident we came back inside and had some snuggles on the couch and talked about how he was feeling–my attempt at “good” parenting today. He calmed down and then we started the muffins.
That was a good 10 minutes.
It all fell apart again when I was standing at the stove putting the batter in the muffin tins. Micah wanted to lick the spoon and very adamantly informed me of this fact over and over again. To get closer he put his foot in the oven drawer and held onto the oven handle. Can you guess what happened next? (I am not winning the mother-of-the-year award for this one). The oven door opened (it is hot) and he fell backward. He didn’t burn himself or hit hard but it did scare him quite a bit (and me). And what do moms do when they are scared for their children? They yell! Which made him cry more. Gah.
After I finished my yelling, I held him for a while and then did what any good mom does when she is fed up for the morning. I turned on a DVD.
And then once Micah calmed down, the drama-queen bug bit Benji.
Motherhood is hard and has not been very much fun lately. Maybe it is the age. Maybe it is me. But sometimes, being a mom just sucks. There I said it.
I am amazed that my kids love me as much as they do because they definitely see the WORST side of me every day.
Sorry for such a long diary-esque post. I think I just needed to process and vent. Can anyone else relate?